Mpuuga has to harvest the rain that is beating him

It is a trite but true observation that every politician in Uganda has many skeletons in their backyards.

This is true of most public officials in some sumptuous positions: they have all committed crimes – either built in a wetland, gave a documented hefty bribe, employed a relative irregularly or other crimes – and are only waiting for their moment to bleed out in the sun.

In fact, the joke goes that when a politician is arrested or comes under intense scrutiny and bad press, the questions we ask are never about evidence of the crimes for which they are being investigated – because it is a given. We rather ask, “with whom are they fighting?” Or “which powerful person have they offended?”

If Kalundi Serumaga’s groundbreaking essay, Parliament is the Bribe, were to be understood as background reading for politics in Kampala – especially parliamentary politics – then all those folks with offices at Parliament Avenue or Kingdom Kampala have been bribed, soiled and are criminals whose cases are a matter of not- yet-needed prosecution.

It is just that there is no one interesting; but if we started digging, the bribe is parliament itself. And Bwana Museveni has taken this personally: he has overwhelmed that house with cash to the point that declining any bribes is what is criminal.

I know, this is an ugly way of doing things because at the end of the day, these games don’t really help the wananchi. These games simply extend our pains. But if you choose to play them – now I’m addressing comrade, Mathias Mpuuga – you have to learn the rules and be ruthless in their execution.

Thus, the challenge for any politician under attack is to figure out how to ruthlessly return the favour, transform themselves into winners in this situation.

THOU SHALT NOT WRITE A BRIBE

I still struggle to understand why Hon Mpuuga actually agreed that the Shs 500 million be written down. This money is small. My guess is that this is actually testament of his goodness. Despite years of being incumbent in a den of crimes, and having seen all the humongous sums that is shared in sacks and picked from people’s bedrooms and behinds of vehicles, Mpuuga struggled to learn how to steal.

Only a junior thief would agree to writing or appending their signatures on any irregular bounty. About the same time, there was Shs 70 million being shared around, and another Shs 40 million. But all these bribes were being picked in sacks in cash and dropped in the backs of vehicles.

To this end, it is my contention that Mpuuga is actually a victim of his own goodness. Conceding to writing his name against these monies being the first mistake, Mpuuga had to be wiser when news about these monies went public. With smouldering animosity between him and his party president, Mpuuga had to pull off a double stroke (a) admit to taking the money but also give Bobi Wine and team no chance to feign ignorance about knowing this a year earlier.

As The Observer reported, Mpuuga had to inform the country that this money had been forced onto him by NRM vultures – as they normally do – and had privately presented this matter to his party president. To this end, Mpuuga would have told the country the truth, and would have carried NUP president along.

In fact, every time this money would be mentioned, Mpuuga would only remind country that he was waiting for guidance from his president.

(b) Notice also that now, Mpuuga would have thrown the entire parliament under the bus, especially, the speaker. But Anita Among, being Anita Among, has continued to defend their bounty, and that matter has been settled on her part.

THOU SHALT NOT DO THINGS IN SECRET

Getting Hon. Muhammad Ssegirinya (fight hard!) and Hon. Allan Ssewanyana out of jail through negotiation with Yoweri Museveni’s team was the right thing. Forget all the empty chants of “we shall not discuss with the tyrant” while being in parliament falling in things.

They said, “he will not be sworn in,” but they are working with him – often puffing and huffing. Mpuuga had to refuse to be bullied away from his victory. Political prisoners – including Olivia Lutaaya and co. – are not candidate for lengthy court proceedings. These are negotiated settlements, and Mpuuga pulled off the right thing. He had to proudly claim it and continue to the next prisoners.

I still struggle to understand why NUP’s 56 legislators never used their numbers to force NRM into the negotiating table to release Olivia Lutaaya and co. Look, it is this ‘negotiation vacuum’ that Minister Balaam Barugahara exploited and ended up giving Olivia Lutaaya and co. their freedom, while having them plead guilty to a heinous crime. They have this charge against their names for life.

It is here that Mpuuga gets exposed, not as a bad man or political novice, but, rather, as a terribly indecisive fellow – easily bullied by his opponents. He would then threaten to sue Daily Monitor for publishing the story of his negotiations only to turn around and claim the same at the funeral of Muhammad Ssegirinya.

Then came the trials and tribulations of Muhammad Ssegirinya and how quietly, respectfully, Hon. Mpuuga stood with this legislator to his last days. Ssegirinya’s mother told us enough. I am not saying Mpuuga should have taken pictures and recorded videos, too. That would be absolute bad manners.

But as a politician, Mpuuga would have remembered to often hold press conferences to share news about his patient. But maybe this is easier to say in hindsight. Moving forward, Mpuuga has to slow his paces. That thing with Alien Skin was rushed. Now he is hawking Norbert Mao’s transaction points. It is not all lost, and there are plenty of causes waiting for leadership.

Consider mine where I am asking Yoweri Museveni to give Uganda a chance when he still can – by not standing in any more elections, especially considering his advanced age. This is not ‘negotiating’ any reforms with him. But simply pleading, asking and talking to him not to stand.

I am still unable to build a movement around this cause, yet I am convinced this is what Uganda needs in the next five years.

yusufkajura@gmail.com

The author is a political theorist based at Makerere University.