Monday January 30 was another day for Uganda National Roads Authority (Unra) executive director Allen Kagina to face MPs who seem to harbor many complaints about roads in their constituencies.

Kagina was this time appearing before the committee on national economy, chaired by Syda Bbumba, the Nakaseke North MP. Whenever Kagina appears before MPs, she has to do a lot of cooling MPs’ anger over bad roads, bribes and non-compensation to their voters affected by road construction.

Last Monday was not any different.

“I was told by workers on Mbale- Sironko-Kapchorwa road about the massive bribery involving works ministry officials. You know the contractors speak Slovenian, which I understand, and they told me bribes are in a line- from accountant to undersecretary, from undersecretary to clerk, from clerk to… …so many and the contractor was forced to reduce the thickness of that road,” said Mbale municipality MP Jack Wamanga Wamai.

The idea that Wamai speaks Slovenian language got MPs murmuring in awe.

Amuria Woman MP Susan Amero was equally ready, and after “firing” Kagina a lot more questions, she concluded: “Madam Kagina, wake up. Your people are eating the roads; if you don’t do something, you re finished.”

Eh! The workers are eating the roads? Who/what will they eat next?

Former minister’s rings puzzle MPs

Since leaving high office, Simon Mayende has adopted hip fashion, or so it seems.

In case you have forgotten, Mayende was once a minister for higher education and MP for Samia Bugwe South in Busia district.

He is now director of information and national guidance in the ministry of ICT and national guidance. The other Tuesday, Mayende was in parliament with a team led by junior minister Idah Nantaba, answering questions regarding the ministry.

Asked to brief MPs on how far his ministry had gone with regulating social media, Mayende spoke like the large politician of old, gesticulating widely to hammer his points home.

Little did he know that the rings on the different fingers had attracted more attention than what he was explaining.

“He is having rings on two fingers; I thought when one puts a ring on that finger [ring finger], it means he/she is married and the other one [middle finger] is for the engaged. Now what is he exactly?” one MP whispered to another during the committee session.

“Is he wearing rings to confuse women, or he is married and engaged?”

EALA hopeful Murangira wins female MP’s heart

As East African Legislative Assembly [Eala] elections edge closer, candidates have come up with different strategies to woo MPs of the 10th Parliament – the voters.

Some offer 2017 diaries, others calendars, ‘lunch’, or all. Over 90 candidates have picked forms from the clerk’s office and are currently struggling to impress MPs.

One MP from Busoga told colleagues last Wednesday that Ambrose Mu- rangira, the executive director of the Uganda National Association for the Deaf (UNAD), had won her over.

The beautiful MP found a desk calendar with her picture and Murangira’s on one side while the other side bore her swearing-in picture which she had never seen.

“You see, during the swearing-in, those people [photographers] took our photos but I didn’t see them in the newspapers or on sale. I didn’t have any copy of my pictures with my family but I was so impressed when I found this calendar bearing my pictures. I think my vote is his already,” she said.

Later, Murangira, through his interpreter, was heard explaining to other MPs that he hired a photographer to take all MPs’ pictures during the swearing-in ceremony because he wanted to know them by name and face in preparation for Eala campaigns.

Well, well, just like the MP, Wolokoso is impressed!

‘Fresher’ makes ‘mature’ Mary sweat over votes

Seniors at university campuses have those moments when they laugh at how ‘new’ or ‘green’ freshers look just after joining.

But every once in a while you can have a sharp fresher (in Lumumba hall, for instance) who gives directions to a third-year or ‘mature’ student (from Mary Stuart hall, for instance).

As far as parliament is concerned, Mary Mugyenyi is a senior, while Kole North MP Bonny Desales Okello is a fresher now in his first term.

For the uninitiated, Mary Mugyenyi is a former animal industry minister, a former Pan African Parliament [PAP] member, and a former MP for 10 years representing Nyabushozi in Kiruhura district.

Mugyenyi is now campaigning to join the East African Legislative Assembly (Eala), which is how fresher Okello got hold of her and made her look like the fresher.

At least that is how one MP from western Uganda felt last Tuesday.

“While here as MP, she was one of the good MPs we had then [7th and 8th Parliament] let alone being knowledge- able, but I am actually surprised that she accepted that new man [MP Bonny Okello] to command her like a kid.

He is new and I doubt if he knows parliament well. It’s as if [Mugyenyi] doesn’t remember even hot spots in parliament like the members’ lounge, south, east and north wing of parliament,” the senior legislator told colleagues.

“I have been seeing that man from Kole commanding her: let’s go this way, she follows; we go that way, she continues; and he [Okello] has actually made that woman [Mugyenyi]so tired yet talking to very few MPs. Anyway, when looking for votes, you can even lose some senses: I think she is not in her senses.”

Well, she may not be in her senses, but when she is ‘in things’, the senses will come rushing in.