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‘Adaptation’ is the correct term, but it feels more like a remake. They have crammed a stellar 20-episode season into eight mediocre episodes, and I don’t think it works.
Granted, I reached that conclusion after watching short clips on YouTube, so maybe the show is better than I realize. However, I don’t have the stomach for remakes. The common sentiment online is that Hollywood should restrict their remakes to horrible movies instead of wasting time on projects that actually succeeded.
In fact, I wanted to dissect some of those bad movies that deserve remakes. But I have decided to postpone that discussion; I would rather talk about the remakes that failed, proving that the concept of remakes is dumb. Psycho 1998 immediately comes to mind as the stupidest remake in all of existence. Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho is a classic.
I was appalled by 1998’s Psycho, a hollow shot-for-shot remake that fails to recapture the sense of dread in the original. Why give audiences the exact same film they saw in 1960?
Keep in mind that Psycho is grounded. This is not a question of updating the CGI to appeal to modern audiences. What a waste!
Carrie from 2013 is not nearly as problematic. However, while it tries to modernize Stephen King’s story, the movie feels unnecessary. It does not do enough to justify its existence.
Oldboy 2013, on the other hand, does not deserve the hate it gets. The remake is a commendable effort on the director’s part to re-interpret the original film for American audiences. So why do fans of the original despise it? Because Oldboy 2003 is a grimy film with visceral action and a harrowing plot twist. It is the kind of film that stays with you for weeks; on the other hand, Oldboy 2013 is just a movie. The plot twist is not the gut punch it should be.
Oldboy 2013 is simply okay while the original film was a flawless masterpiece. I have a similar opinion of RoboCop 2014. On its own, the remake is perfectly serviceable. The remake is clearly aimed at a younger audience. You could say the same about the original film. Then again, Hollywood’s idea of family-friendly entertainment was drastically different in the 1980s.
The original RoboCop is ridiculous and campy in all the best ways, set in a dystopian city where no one bats an eye whenever a part human/part machine cop blows limbs off the cartoonish villains running amok in their community.
RoboCop 2014 took itself way too seriously. Total Recall 2012 fell into a similar trap. If you are anything like me, you had nightmares for weeks after watching that scene in the original film where Arnold Schwarzenegger’s eyes threatened to pop like balloons in the vacuum of space.
The remake feels sanitized, once again stripped of the zany violence that made 80s action flicks such a blast. I will defend The Wicker Man 2006, partly because I don’t like the original film, but mostly because Nicholas Cage’s performance in the remake is amusing. But that does not make it a justified remake. I would add it to that category of films that are equal parts terrible and entertaining.
I watched Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes 2001 as a child and loved it. After rewatching it as an adult, I understand why critics call it soulless and flat.
Look, I get why Hollywood is obsessed with remakes. They are easier to market because they already have a following. Fans of the original are more likely to watch the remake if only to satisfy their curiosity. However, the fact that most remakes fail should give Hollywood pause.
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